Grand Master of Militia has seedy hobby

Anonymous sources within the Militia have
led to an investigation by the Tease into
Grand Master Darwin of the Militia Guild.
His obscene fascination with feathered
vermin has become common knowledge
amongst many, indeed he has publicly
outed himself as a ‘pigeon fancier’ many a
time!
Vermin
Is it any wonder that crime remains high,
the Diamonds remain unfound and
innocent grandmothers fear to walk the
field after dark, when the man responsible
for keeping us all safe instead spends his
time in feathery frolics?
When approached for comment, Darwin
stated “I’m just very keen on ‘down’”
before retreating furtively into a nearby
pigeon coop. We leave it to the reader to
draw their own con-coo-sions.
The Tease asks: How much longer can this
be allowed to go on?!
Should Darwin be up before the Beak?!