Special Pull-out and keep apology section!

Ye Note From The Editor

In the pursuit of bringing you the finest in educating, entertaining and generally damned
interesting news, there are times when with the best will in the world, mistakes are made. Words
are said, then others in reply to the initial word’s response, and then before you have time to put
on your hat, people are standing on death-mats and armies are being gathered.
Is some of this down to people not understanding the purpose or how to best use the free
platform that we provide to anyone who wishes to be heard? Very much so. But there is also a
large weight of responsibility to be born upon the shoulders of us as an editorial team, and
ultimately my own as proprietor, editor in chief, fount of all wisdom and most eligible batchelor of
Erdreja, 1113-?.
Hence this special section, for all readers to pull out and keep in a special place, containing
requested apologies from various sources and agencies. There is also included a very special offer-
you will find at the back of this section a cut-out voucher, good for one free apology for offence or
harm caused and a frank and friendly discussion of the matter, to be given over drinks at the
Cream Tease. (Limit, one per reader per event. Applies only to those with a provable causative link
of offence or harm. Any unliving patterns taking up this offer should first contact Karl Morgan via
a living intermediary to ensure safe passage into Harts camp and not being dismissed by jumpy
At this juncture, it would perhaps help to lay out the purpose of this publication- it is, and has
always been intended to give every person on Erdreja the chance to have their opinions and
thoughts heard, to open up dialogue between third parties and provide amusement, information
and a stake in the wider world to anyone. From the lowliest dung-shoveller to the crowned heads
of the world, we will publish any piece submitted that we feel has merit under the above
categories with no concern as to the position, power or influence of the author. Hence why the
majority of our articles are published anonymously, barring special contributors who have
requested the credit- to provide a voice for those who might feel threatened to speak up in
If in future any amongst you see a piece that you disagree with, or you feel is offensive or wrong
then I would strongly urge this: Send in a rebuttal. Everyone has the right to reply, to create a
news dialogue, and there is no evil that we here view in a worse light than censorship. If your
courier brings a missive insulting you, then traditionally one does not kill the messenger but
instead sends a reply back with them. View our humble periodical then as a forum to have your
views heard publicly; if those views are critical of anything we have published then all the better!
For too long the press in Erdreja has been anything but free; the Tease is not here to stifle dissent
or its critics, but rather to encourage those of a questioning or critical nature to put pen to paper
and add their own legacy to our archives!
Signed by the Editor, Karl Morgan. KM

Apology requested by Naobi Drussus, of
the Gryphons

(All content, spelling and punctuation is included from the original document provided, unedited)
I, Karl Morgan, of the Harts, Editor of the Tease, wish the following to be known:
Of my own volition I puplished, in the Tease multiple felonious comments that are derogatory
towards the Prima Legata Imperialus, Governess of the state of Padova in New Tebron and head
of the Eagle Cohort; Lady Naobi Drussus
I admit now that these were incorrect and slanderous. By alowing these articals to be puplished, I
have brought shame to the Cream Teas. The Harts, and to my loyal readers, to whom I have
brought a disservice. I, and the editorial staff of the Tease, retract EVERYTHING that I puplished in
the issues in question. And, I do humbly and unreservedly apologise for all harm, offence and
injury to the very noble, most gracious, forgiving Lady Naobi and hence to extention, our good
allies the Gryphons them selves.

Apology and retraction requested by the
government of albion

In the Great Erdrejan Fayre issue of the Tease we published an anonymously submitted piece in
our ‘Juicy Little Nuggets’ section inviting ‘disgruntled citizens’ of Albion to travel to the Spine of
Albion to find friends and like-minded individuals.
Our apology here is twofold- firstly, due to a printing error the destination circle was listed as ‘The
Spine Of Tebron’ rather than the submitted circle. Secondly, it was discovered after going to print
that this was in fact an attempt by forces unknown to lure innocent victims to a fate which, while
currently undefined would doubtless be as grizzly as a norscan bear in winter.
We apologise wholeheartedly to both the original submitter for the printing error, and to anyone
who may have ended up being lured to the original submitter’s hideous plans as a result of the
article. We also, while maintaining the apology to them for our printing error, strongly encourage
and hopefully await the submitter being bought to justice under the full force of the law.
Apology to any offended by the article on

Londinium in the last Tease

In our last issue we postulated multiple solutions for dealing with the current situation regarding
the unliving horde in Londinium. While we only intended to create a dialogue around the subject
and float ideas on how to make the best of a bad situation, we are informed that some have taken
offence to this. This was never intended and is apologised for unreservedly. In addition, our
editorial team has signed on with the forthcoming sortie to the area, in order to demonstrate our
bona fides in this matter and our genuine investment in finding a solution best for all people of

Miscellaneous errors, retractions,
clarifications and other corrections
past, present and future

Isaac Hulce is a lovely man and absolutely not ‘comme ci comme ca’
Grandmaster Darwin of the Militia Guild absolutely does have a weird lust for feral fowl

Brother Ross is probably not a robot

Greenskins are not ‘humans who are past their sell-by date’

While the jury is still out on Theo D’Arby being a necromancer or not, he absolutely is a very lovely
person with nice hair.

We apologise for advocating strict leash laws for lycanthropes. Mostly to the lycanthropes.
Cheese from Lyonnesse is actually bloody tasty, and their wine is top notch. There is no evidence
that consumption of solidified dairy produce has any effect on the strength of will in fighting men,
and we advocate wholeheartedly the production and consumption of brie.
The Bears are a nation with a long, storied (and violent) history and have every right to maintain
their independence, no matter how amazing the ‘Greater Albion’ project would be.
Not all Dragons are ‘woad clad degenerates’; just the ones that keep stealing from the Cream

Tease and vandalising the Harts faction notice boards.

We apologise to sentient unliving for the spreading of hurtful jokes about ‘coming out of the
coffin’ or ‘cracking open a cold one’ and the like.

There is not a new monster lurking in the darkness with red glowing eyes ready to seize the
unwary after dark- this was likely one of several such similar entities that have been previously
encountered. (Correct at time of going to press)

It was wrong to attempt to market prophylactic condoms with the likeness of Brother Ross
printed upon them- both morally and also from a business perspective. He’s not exactly a turn-on.
Absinthe and kender are two things that should never be combined, and we apologise for doing

The Caledonian accent is not a disability.
Nor is the Erin one.
Or Cymrian.

Vampires do not ‘suck’- we are reliably informed that the pressure of the arterial spray means
they merely need to open their mouths and swallow.


Special free gift!

This voucher, good for one free
apology for any offence, harm,
insult, slander or other
unpleasantness incurred.

To be presented at The Cream
Tease in Harts Camp in exchange
for an apology.



You will also receive a full and frank discussion of the
issue you have raised over drinks. And while you’re
there, why not sample one of our lovely workers? No
matter how hurt your posterior may be, our workers
are guaranteed to make you leave with a smile on your

*Visits with our workers not included in this offer. Limit of one voucher per customer per event. Any
unliving patterns should contact Karl Morgan at the Cream Tease through an intermediary first to
ensure safe passage through Harts camp.